How To Teach Your Kid To Follow The Rules?
In life, you can’t do everything; there are rules to follow!
How to educate my child and teach him to respect authority and parental rights? That’s normal!
…most parents – if not all- are concerned about their kids following and applying the rules!
This is because the stakes are high…
Educating your child in understanding the rules is nothing more or less like trying to make him a little being who will respect the rules of life in society and flourish.
A rule of thumb: you do not civilize a child; you give him frameworks to help him civilize himself…
Learning the world’s laws is not only with the head but also with the body, the heart, and the emotions.
Just as concrete is made of cement, so the child is built with the law. It becomes part of him…
In this article, we will share some tips and tricks to help you make your child “a good boy” who listens to you and does the right things all the time! Let’s get started.
It’s not easy to establish your authority.
You may see some children who learn the rules from outside without having integrated them inside. In adolescence, these children who were said to be so good were breaking the laws continuously!
That’s said, …the importance of appealing to your child’s understanding rather than imposing rules that are meaningless to them is a consideration to keep in mind.
Why? This will help to obtain his adhesion rather than cast it in a mold. Still, the exercise of authority is rarely a piece of cake.
Denying your child’s needs and imposing prohibitions on him is always a bit of pain. And, honestly, no parents like to feel this way when dealing with kids.
In life, everything is not possible, and it is frustrating!
The limited child will stop living under the illusion that he can always have more and stop feeling unhappy and unloved.
Because a child who thinks that he can constantly obtain more believes that if we don’t give him what he wants, it’s because we don’t love him!
From 2 years old, tell her that you can’t do everything
To be able to live in society, your child must integrate three fundamental prohibitions:
Kids cannot act like their parents:
You must always set limitations for his requests. Noting that you should communicate with him the reasons for saying “No” to his request.
We do not hit each other for any reason:
Explain it: Your daddy doesn’t bang on the neighbor every time he turns his TV on too loud or leaves his garbage bag outside the door.
Try always to use simple language that is so close to his understanding level.
Everyone must not have the others’ belongings:
You don’t grab his toys; you don’t damage his clothes, etc., because these things belong to him, and doing so will make him feel upset.
In short: it’s about getting the message across: don’t do to others what you wouldn’t want them to do to you.
The issue is that to imagine what the other person is feeling, your child must still have acquired a certain degree of motor independence.
He should know how to get by without the help of anyone in all the small daily gestures: getting up, going to the bathroom, eating, etc…
Integrating the law works with autonomy. You can’t ask (or force) a child to do it before 2-3 years old!
The best way to educate your child is to set an example:
Explain to your child that you have obligations too. You can’t walk around naked in the street or buy anything you like!
Your toddler will be more accepting of the limits you give him when he realizes that you are accountable too.
A rule of thumb: a child is built by taking his parents as models! Remember that your every gesture is a message.
Enforce the prohibitions
Needless to say…
..even if you have imposed prohibitions, it is difficult for your child to give up the satisfaction of his desires.
He also needs to test the barriers you put in place! It’s up to you to show him that you are ready to make them respect you!
You need to know that a child perceives very well the determination and the conviction of the adult.
Explain to him the reason for your request once (for example, you don’t snatch this toy from your brother’s hands, it’s up to him to decide if he wants to lend it to you). You will possibly explain this twice if he doesn’t seem to have understood correctly.
But, at the third, be firm!
You have the right to show your anger! What you need to do next is to explain to him what the next step is.
Above all, please do not go into endless explanations; you do not have to take his support at all costs. The more you communicate with your child, the more he will seek to negotiate!
How to punish the kid if he does not obey?
It’s up to each parent to decide, depending on their child. Of course, the punishment must annoy him; otherwise, it has no value.
The effective punishment is that which the parent feels capable of holding, which he assumes while feeling legitimate.
If the parent feels that they are causing their child to suffer excessively, it will not work. He will be uncomfortable, will not have the necessary conviction, and will feel that there is a possible escape!
Remember, Kids, are so smart!
What to do if your child keeps breaking the rules?
So, you did your job and set all the rules that your child must obey, but you feel that nothing has changed? Don’t panic; that is okay!
Your little one may not respect them… That’s normal, though! He is not the only one! If your little one is constantly disobeying and doing silly things over and over, take the time to talk to him.
Your listening to him will allow him to become aware of his behavior and gradually succeed in expressing his anxieties through words instead of putting them into action. Usually, the kid who doesn’t feel that his parents were firm when imposing the rules will always break and disobey them constantly.
Educate your child: 9 mistakes not to make
1) Believe that your kid will get the rules on his own. Education is a must!
2) You only explain the rules without further actions. A phase of the brawl is inevitable.
3) Prohibit everything. This will make him feel upset all the time.
4) Not explaining the orders to your kid.
5) You say that you will be punished, but nothing happens…you lose all credibility. Next time he’ll look at you with a smirk.
6) Forbid one day, allow the next day: your child needs consistency; otherwise, he doesn’t understand anything.
7) Being terrified at the idea of making your little one suffers. Of course, you are imposing frustrations on him. But these are normal and inevitable sufferings. It’s the same when you ask him not to put his hand in the outlet!
8) You imagine that, because you forbid something to your child, you are unloving parents.
9) Assimilate your child to his actions. Don’t call him a thief if he stole something. Just explain what a thief is and tell him that he will be punished if this happens again.
